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I got stunt doubles for us, Brittany!!
Bitches come in all shapes and sizes. Male or female. They are any race, ethnicity, and orientation. It takes one to know one. But- some people are more of a bitch than others. I'm probably being a huge one right now for even writing this article. But, for entertainments' sake, and for the fact that it is Brittany's birthday, here are 5 Ways to Identify a Super Bitch:
5. You have that gut feeling.
If you get any type of strange vibe from them when you first meet them, don't even try to make it work. Save yourself the heartache. If everyone loves them, and you're the only one who doesn't, there is probably a reason for it.. like you're the only one who sees through their bullshit and everyone else is too blind to see. Follow your instincts, it's your sixth sense!
4. They are drama queens.
If you have failed at listening to your instincts and have begun to give this person a chance, you may now have another chance at freeing yourself. Take notice that SB's really like to blow things up. To the max. All attention must be on them- whether it be a medical condition, a pregnancy scare, a broken bone, a dead goldfish, their stepdad's second cousins' broken nail- you name it. They got it. And everyone knows about it. Get out now, because it only gets worse.
3. They are the best at everything, and loved everything before you did.
"Oh my god, is that Betsey Johnson?! My crib liner was Betsey Johnson! My mom and I LOVE her! My 5th cousin twice removed met Betsey Johnson." After so long, the average SB will say something similar to this about everything you own. They want to give portray the illusion that they're better than you in every way, shape and form. Deep down, I feel like they still realize that you can see through them and their ways- so, they do the best they can to make you feel small.
2. They are manipulative.
They're as sweet as pie when they ask you to do something for them. It could be anything, I mean ANYTHING. They're also manipulative in the sense that they make you think what they think. And, they are really good at it, which is scary. This process is used enhance trust in their victims. It always works, because they seem like the most trustworthy people in the world. Until-
1. You trip and fall. They will never be the ones to help you back up.
In fact, they would stand there, laugh, and call everyone over to laugh with them. This, my friends, is the nature of a super bitch. They kick you when you're down. They abandon you in your time of need. They choose everyone else over you.
How to tell a true friend from a super bitch:
Sometimes, a person just has some of these qualities without realizing it. Some. Or, it is a super bitch in disguise. How you can tell is this: call them out.
If they apologize and feel bad, they are a keeper. Most likely, they didn't realize they were doing it, and didn't mean to hurt you.
If they get defensive, angry, storm out, and blame you for everything, then sorry. You have a super bitch on your hands.
I've dealt with many people like this before. Hey- they have really good taste in music! But, with the new school year starting, Brittany and I have pledged to remain super bitch-free this year. Do yourself a favor, and do the same!
Until next time-
Lexi, the Bitch expert
I really enjoyed reading this, god job! xX
ReplyDeleteThanks so much! I'm glad you liked it :)
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